tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85666939109918086492024-03-18T21:01:14.812-07:00Better Late Than NeverJ-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-17457512441352228902021-01-01T22:14:00.002-08:002021-01-01T22:14:29.770-08:00A word for 2021<p> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">I have always been a procrastinator… someone who can always find a good
reason to put off until tomorrow what could, and usually should, be done today.
Sometimes for a good reason, more often for a sketchy reason, or no reason at
all, I would decide that it could wait. Whatever it was, however important it
was… I had time later, or would make time later. It would get done.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">Of course, the flip side of any good procrastinator is the ability to
get away with it… to power through whatever you have to do in record time, just
before the deadline, and not pay any price at all for all of the delays. In
retrospect, maybe the worst thing that happened to me in my university career
was the time I went to a morning English class in my first year of university,
on the day our big research paper was due, with not much more than a topic and
some sources in hand. The prof spoke at length about how, if we hadn’t put in
weeks worth of work on this essay, we weren’t going to do well, and very
possibly going to fail. I was a little panicky in class that day, with none of
my 2000 words written, and his words ringing in my ears. But, as has always
tended to happen, that ability that too often lies dormant in me kicked in, the
words started flowing, and I got those 2000 words written over the course of
that day.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">The beauty of college courses, of course, were that even then due date
was exactly that… your assignments were due on that specific date, at any time.
In the pre-email days we are talking about, however, things were a little more
challenging… you had to get in to campus, where the secretaries who were there
until aomost the end of night classes would accept your papers, and make sure
they went into the box of your professor. But only after they stamped it with
that all important date stamp, that signified, despite all of your
procrastination, that your paper was in on time.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">So why was this paper a terrible thing? Because it was the point that I
realized, even at university, I was able to get away with it. This rushed,
barely researched paper that I whipped off on the day it was due, that I
literally finished, spell-checked (which wasn’t done in real time by computers
then), printed, and handed in, not only got me an A+, but the top mark in the
class on that paper, and a compliment from my prof. It taught me that I could
get away with procrastinating, as long as possible, and not pay any price.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">Of course, as with any lesson like that, you continue to push those
boundaries, until you reach the point where you can’t get away with it. I went
to that point, and then far beyond… and, in a nutshell, that’s why I didn’t
start teaching until I was almost 40. I got rattled, I got to a point where I
felt like I was wasting all of that ‘potential’ I had (my feelings about that
word are another post), and I basically shut down school and went another way,
until I was finally able to come back to it much later in life.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">Oddly, we are now in a time where, in a way, procrastination is what is
keeping us safe. All of those things that we normally do, the good and bad and
everything in between, are on hold indefinitely. Want to see your family? Nah,
not today… maybe later. Go to a concert? Nope. Travel? Well, maybe within your
health region, depending on the day, and the latest words from DBH. But so many
of those places on your bucket list, things to do and see and experience, will
have to wait until after the vaccine, at least, until who knows when. 2020 was
a whole lot of things, most of them bad, but on some level it was the year we
all became procrastinators.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">Given both my history, and the current state of the world, I decided I
needed to start 2021 with some direction; with intention, to get beyond all of the
shit and chaos that has marked both my life and the world over the last few
years. This is a year where I will move into an amazing new home, with an
amazing partner that I feel so privileged to get to love; a year where I will
start a new job (and no, I have no idea yet what that job will be, but it’s
time), finish my schooling once and for all, and begin to reap the rewards of
all the stress and struggle and strife. (Alliteration, for my English teacher
gf) I’m reminded of a quote I saw written randomly on a wall in Vancouver, that
came up in my Facebook memories the other day: “you know all of those things
you’ve always wanted to do? You should go do them.” And the time to do them is
my word for 2021: Now.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">No more waiting. No more procrastinating, delaying, fucking around. As
my amazing, brilliant, total smart-ass kiddo likes to point out, I’m in my late
40s now, and while that’s not exactly old, it’s not exactly young, either. I’m
going to start doing all of those things I want to do, need to do, can’t wait
to do... Now. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve said things like this
before, taken steps down that road on a number of occasions, but my false
starts are over. I was struck with this thought tonight, and it seemed to me
that the best way to jump start the process was to write this down. <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;"><span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">And do it now.<o:p></o:p></span></p>J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-55738820109839720782019-05-24T13:47:00.002-07:002019-05-24T13:47:48.545-07:00One Week<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">It’s a really strange place I find myself in today… in some ways, in a
better place than I’ve ever been, and in others, so lost I’m not sure what to
do with myself right now, never mind tomorrow, next week or next month. I’ve
been looking for a way in, a way to open the door let some of it out, and haven’t
been able to find a way.. until right now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I’ve been home for the last
couple of days… took them off to try to wrap my head around the fact that Nanny
is gone; and in that regard, I’ve failed miserably. I’m lucky, I know; I’m
almost 46, and have dealt with an incredibly small amount of loss in my life.
Almost 46, still with 2 grandparents, parents who are together, a large,
amazing family. But because of that, even as I think I’m pretty good at coping
with life, I also realize that I’m not entirely sure how to deal with loss. I
was 20 when Papa passed away, and I struggled with that for a long time; I feel
like I should be better equipped now, but, apparently, I’m not. I’m working on
a post about Nanny, about everything she meant to me, but I’m struggling to
write it, as well; hopefully that will come to me soon, perhaps in a moment of
inspiration just like this one seems to be, although I guess I shouldn’t speak
too much until I’m done writing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>So I’m home, and instead of
doing the myriad of things I should be doing, I’m flipping through the channels
on TV, and a little movie that I saw years ago and loved came on. It’s called
One Week, starring Joshua Jackson; in it, the main character is diagnosed with
late stage, terminal cancer, and rather than begin his new life as a patient,
he hops on a motorbike and heads west from Toronto.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is rooted in Canada; he stops at all
manner of small-town oddities (a giant paperclip, dinosaur, teepee… I was
waiting for the giant lamp from Donalda to show up), before ending up on the
beach in Tofino, where a German couple reminds him about the beauty of the
place he is lucky enough to be from. I’ve always felt incredibly lucky to be
Canadian; that, too, is another wormhole I need to avoid going down, but as I
contemplated a life that may have meant leaving it behind, at least for a
while, I came to realize that there is nowhere else on earth I want to live.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Which brings me back to the
current moment; restless, uneasy, and yet optimistic about the future, and very
much aware that looking forward I have more opportunities than I ever have, and
opportunities that I will be contemplating from a stronger position than I’ve
ever been in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Less than a year from now
I will have completed my masters, finished the last schooling I’m ever going to
do (and my god has it taken me forever to get here!); I will be in a continuing
counselling job, working with kids I click with, kids that I am very well suited
to help, even if I’m not sure at this point whether they are the age group I
want to continue with. Counsellors are in short supply these days; I will be
able to switch districts, should I choose to, and the door to school admin will
also be open to me, should I choose to go that route. I will have a plethora of
good opportunities, doors open to me that I know I am suited to go through,
fully capable of taking whichever path I should choose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>And even as next year seems to
close in so many ways, next week also seems far away. The hoops of the masters
program are incredibly hard to jump through, not because I’m not capable, but
because it just feels like hoops that we are jumping through. My living
situation is… fluid, might be a good word for it; I’ve got next month dealt
with, and a place to go eventually, but there’s some gaps in there, and I’m
struggling with that a little bit. Not that I’m worried I’ll have no place to
go, just that it all seems so tenuous, at a time where I feel like some good
solid roots might be a good thing. I described myself as a tarp flapping in the
breeze the other day, and it still seems apt; still attached, not actually
going anywhere for the moment, but also not nearly as grounded as I’m used to.
But maybe I just need to embrace that for a while, relish in the fact that I
have some freedom, and the means and opportunity to drift on the wind and enjoy
it, rather than regret it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>So maybe that’s how I’ll fill
that potential gap this summer; maybe I’ll do the trip Joshua Jackson’s
character took, except in reverse. Explore this amazing country of ours, see
some places new and some familiar, and just go where the wind takes me for a
little while. I did a weekend trip like that recently, and loved it; there are
not a ton of times in your life where it’s as easy as it will be for me to do
that, so why not? I’m not even sure what I’m looking for, so who knows what I’ll
find; I also know that there’s the distinct possibility that I’ll find that
what I’m coming back to is exactly what I want. Friends, family, a fulfilling
career in a place that I love; that’s a pretty awesome set of circumstances to
come back to… even as I write this I see that. Life is good… I see that, I just
need to cut loose from it for a little while to truly appreciate it again, I
think.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>The movie ended with a quote,
and, as always, I asked my friend Google if he knew who it was from.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So simple, as so many of these quotes are,
and yet so powerful. It’s from Tennyson’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ulysses</i>,
and it’s maybe a better summary of life than I’ve ever seen in one line. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-ansi-language: EN-CA;">To strive, to seek, to
find, and not to yield<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-38480149760539425282014-06-12T00:55:00.000-07:002014-06-12T00:55:19.051-07:00Thank You, CMS<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
First, I want to say I’m sorry; I
know this isn’t the way you wanted your year to end, in confusion and chaos,
with really only one day’s notice that the end of the year is upon us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean, your summer holidays start early, and
you don’t have to write your final exams, so it’s not all bad, I guess, but
this is not the way your year, and for some of you your time at middle school,
should end.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You don’t deserve how this
year is ending, and I wish it were different.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
Next, I want to say congratulations
on getting through another year of school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Success is different for everyone, and I know that each and every one of
you were able to celebrate a number of successes through the year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it was straight As, maybe it was a
victory on the rugby field or basketball court, and maybe it was getting through
the year, and passing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope I was able
to help you achieve some of those successes, or at least not get in the way of
you reaching them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know I have a lot
to learn as a teacher, but you can trust that my effort and intentions were
always there, even if my skill sometimes wasn’t.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
I want to say thank you, for
being (mostly) very patient with me as I figured out how to do this amazing,
exhausting, rewarding, at times frustrating job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Early on in the year, before I really knew
any of you, I wasn’t sure that would be the case; there were some issues, as
there always will be, and while I handled them the best I could, I wasn’t sure
it would be good enough to get through the year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of you can be very challenging at times…
you know who you are. The real breakthrough for me came when, at the end of a
kinda rough day, I mentioned in one of my classes that the reception for subs
can sometimes be rocky; the response I got (“well yeah, but you’re not a sub,
you’re our teacher”) was more important than to me than you will ever
know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I may have thanked you for it
already; I will again tomorrow, just to make sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crossing the line from sub to teacher was a
big step.</div>
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As the year went on, I came to
know those of you I taught better, and, gradually, even more and more of you;
those in my classes, those who I coached, even those of you who I just came in
contact with in the halls, or the gym, or my classroom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A goal at the start of the year was to become
part of the school community, and I think that is the goal I was most
successful with:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>thank you for helping
me with that.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
To those of you moving on to high
school, I wish you the best of luck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
had a number of discussions with other teachers this year about what a great
group of grade 9s we had; not sure you heard that very often, but I think you
should, one last time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I taught most of
you, came to know many more, and you went from the grade that I most nervous
about teaching to the one I was most comfortable with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You will probably not get a final awards
ceremony, or success assembly, as you deserve, but again, that is through no
fault of your own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re caught in the
middle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It sucks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sorry.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
To those of you back at CMS next
year, I hope to see you there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have no
idea what will happen this summer, but hopefully, if things fall into place, I
will find a way to be back there teaching next year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have more things that bring a smile to my
face, like Dang-it or literally, like Gandalf or 666, and find a new April Fool’s
joke to play on you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It got more
difficult as the year went on; you started to realize, sometimes, that I wasn’t
serious, that the surprise quizzes, or changed due dates were simply to mess
with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You put a smile on my face
every single day; I hope I was often able to do the same for you.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
It’s been an awesome year, and I’m
not going to let the terrible way it is ending diminish that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
Thank you, CMS</div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-61448865691748348392014-06-07T09:04:00.003-07:002014-06-07T09:04:36.569-07:00Why I Will Vote Yes<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
I’m no expert on the BCTF, labour
law, or any type of union negotiations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s very possible that my take on this entire process is naïve, or
misguided, or just plain wrong. I sincerely hope that the people in charge of
negotiations on our side are judging the situation much better than I am, and
that the results of our current struggle are going to be very different than I
am afraid they are.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps the purpose
of the strike vote is to get another strong mandate from the union, to show the
government that we are united in willing to fully walk off the job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope so, because the alternative seems like
a fatal mistake to me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
The gist of the Griffin case that
the government shocked and horrified so many by appealing (and I never got
that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With so much money on the line,
and so much face for them to lose with that decision, of course they were going
to appeal. They had no other option.) was that the government was negotiating
in bad faith, that their entire strategy was to stall, delay, and frustrate the
BCTF into an all-out strike.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This was
their end-game, the thing that they most of all wanted us to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do we really think that has drastically
changed in any of the negotiations since?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
To me, it didn’t seem like the
Phase One strike mode we were in was doing much… no emails, no meetings, not
much change and not much impact.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If that
were the case, however, then why did the government take the unprecedented step
they took with the lockout?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a
drastic, confrontational action that seemed illogical, vindictive and poorly
thought out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I now still believe the
latter two points (are we finished with the clarifications yet?), but with how
things have played out since, I’m starting to understand the logic of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Escalate, increase pressure, take the
initiative.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be in control.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What I didn’t get at the time was that the
action could do nothing but increase teachers’ resolve, make us more unified…
wasn’t that counter-productive to the government’s side in this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps, unless they don’t think they will break
us this time, but instead just want to beat us into submission.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, a unified union (redundant?) is exactly
what they want… a strike will just come sooner.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
I hate… no, I HATE, the idea of
striking for so many reasons, especially at this time of year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mid-June should be a celebration of the just
completed year for the younger grades, and that vital prep time for stressful
and important final exams for the older ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>These are kids we have worked our asses off for, and with, for nine
months, and they deserve better than having us walk out in the last few days of
the school year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is my first year
of teaching, my first time having my kids (and they have become, in so many
ways, my kids) for an entire year, and I have come to realize that I love the
job, and I have a knack for it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not
a great, or in some ways even a good, teacher yet, but the potential is there,
and it will come with experience. I don’t want to end my year like this… but at
this point, where are right now, I don’t think we have any choice.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
There is a lot of talk on Twitter
right now about what a No vote would mean; and I think that some of the more
militant members of the BCTF are doing themselves, and their colleagues, a
disservice with how coercive and, at times, bullying, they are coming
across.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People who vote no will do so
because they don’t believe a strike is in our best interests, in their students’
best interests, in the best interests of the public education system that you
have to care about if you work in it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I seriously
considered it, and in many ways believe it would be the right thing to do; but
I won’t.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
As bad as a unified strike will
be for our cause, in my opinion, it would be infinitely worse to have our union
split down the middle over what we should do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>A weak mandate, widespread dissension within the union, in-fighting even
as we are in the midst of a bigger battle, and we are done for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now is not the time to eat our own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There will be questions once this is said and
done, about the leadership, about our strategy, about where our money has gone
to, but this is not the time to ask those questions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am rarely a pessimistic person, but in this
moment, with these negotiations, I am there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As Ben Franklin so aptly put it, we must all hang together, or we will
surely hang separately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think our
options now are a strike and imposed settlement, or a broken union.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sincerely hope I’m wrong.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
And it is not just our union’s
future that is at stake here, make no mistake.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This government has mounted a systematic attack on the public education
system, and we who provide it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If we let
them push forward their agenda, unchecked, the results to our public school
system will be devastating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is no
coincidence that Christy Clark’s son goes to private school; it is no
coincidence that our current Minister of Education once said that the BCTF
should get out of education.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are
not looking to make a deal here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
are looking to break us.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
I am no longer hopeful that any
deal will be reached at the table, with the current situation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have handled the endgame poorly, and have
taken a stand at a time I don’t think we should have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That said, our options are limited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We can strike, and deal with whatever comes
from that, or we can split down the middle, and face the end of our union.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: 36.0pt;">
Better beaten than broken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will vote Yes.</div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-88884865560739919592013-08-29T13:54:00.001-07:002013-08-29T13:54:19.119-07:00I know...<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I’ll never forget the day I got the phone call that every
parent dreads.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lizzie has to go into
emergency right now, it said… there’s a problem with her platelets.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t know much when I got that call, but
I knew enough that an issue with her platelets could very possibly mean
leukemia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know now there are worse
words a parent can hear than that one (from second hand knowledge, thank… well,
whoever it is you thank for that), but in that moment that was scary enough.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We had
noticed over the last few months that Lizzie seemed to bruise very badly, very
easily, and the bruises seemed to linger longer than they should.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This came to a head when she slipped and fell
while walking down a stone staircase, bruising herself very badly in the
process; these bruises were very deep, and lasted far longer than seemed
normal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We finally took her in to get
them checked out, and her doctor ordered blood tests.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was these test results that caused that
phone call; something wasn’t right, and in that moment it seemed like it could
be very wrong.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We
figured out pretty quickly that while Lizzie’s condition was serious, it wasn’t
nearly as bad as we initially feared.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Nights at the hospital were quickly unnecessary, and we began to spend
time (more than we wanted, but less than so many others) at the BCCH Oncology/Hematology
clinic, there for a few hours while Lizzie got her treatment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have been going there every three, or
four, or five, weeks, as needed, for almost six years now, and that time there
has made it clear that we are absolutely some of the lucky ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So many families, so many stories, all
different and yet at the core all fundamentally the same; we do whatever we
can, whatever we need to, to make our kids feel better.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Over
our time at BCCH, the stories of two families have stuck out for me, because of
personal connections; these families are amazing, their stories tragic, and
heartbreaking, and uplifting. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I won’t
tell you their stories here;<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>if you want
to read them, they can be found at these two links:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jasper Mohan (<a href="http://jasperupdates.tumblr.com/">http://jasperupdates.tumblr.com/</a> )
and Lilee-Jean Whittle-Putt (<a href="http://loveforlilee.com/">http://loveforlilee.com/</a>
) </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Jasper
was, by every account I’ve ever heard, an amazing young man who could have done
whatever he liked in this world; personable, well spoken, hard-working, and
absolutely brilliant. He fit more into his 15 years than many will in a
lifetime, a statement which sounds so trite, and yet in this case is
accurate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never actually met Jasper;
we were in the clinic at BCCH at the same time one day, and I intended to
introduce myself, but he was so busy talking to nurses, and doctors, and
parents, and other patients, that I never got a chance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You could literally feel the room brighten
when he walked in, and see the effect he had on so many people in such a short
time; again, sounds trite, but true. Everyone knew him, everyone wanted to talk
to him, and even then, with what would turn out to be only weeks left in his
life, he was up to the challenge, and more.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Lilee-Jean’s
story is one that has hit a little closer to home; I know the family, not well,
but as we do in a small town where your parents have taught virtually every kid
to graduate in the last 30 years. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>LJ has
taken a turn for the worse in the last few days, and it looks like her story
may be coming to an end all too soon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>All that is left to do now is pray, for those who do; I hope those
prayers, of the countless people who are including LJ in theirs, are
answered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Children should not have to go
through everything that this amazing, strong, resilient little girl has.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>As
a parent, these stories hit a lot closer to home than they otherwise
would.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You hug your child a little
tighter, tell them you love them a little more often, check on them in the
night one more time, as if these things will keep them safe from all the danger
the world has to offer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We do it because
it is what we can do, and hope that by controlling what we can, we will keep
them safe.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
found out pretty early on that there were things beyond my control, that we can’t
protect them from the dangers that lurk in their own bodies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am one of the lucky ones, though; my
daughter is bright, and cheerful, and in almost every way perfectly
healthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She is growing like a weed,
growing up way too fast, and becoming more and more amazing each and every day.
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Taller, cheekier, funnier, smarter; more
her, more the person that she is going to become, and I am thankful every day
that I get to see it.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
Because I know
what it’s like to get a phone call from the doctor, telling you that your
perfect little child isn’t perfect, and there may be something terribly wrong.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
I know what it’s
like to sit on a hospital bed while doctors poke and probe your child, doing
their best but scaring and hurting your child, with you unable to do a damn
thing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
I know what it’s
like to lay awake through the night in a hospital bed, your child sleeping
beside you, while you wonder if tomorrow is going to be the day you get the bad
news, even as you hope it will be good.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
I know what it’s
like to check on your child in the night, almost afraid to look because you are
afraid something has gone wrong, something very specific and real.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt; text-indent: .5in;">
I know all of
these things and a million more, things that 9 years ago it never even crossed
my mind that I would have to learn.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And
in spite of knowing these things… no, that’s not right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think it’s even more because of these
things I know, I know that when it comes to circumstances like this, I don’t
know a single goddamn thing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
Andrew and Chelsey, my thoughts
and prayers are with you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Stephen and
Barb, I am so sorry for your loss.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 12.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-60079707269829684282013-07-27T15:06:00.004-07:002013-07-27T15:06:46.652-07:00Moving On<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtOR6UdN_4kfVkLt4LJg7FVo7hhlFDqd_bf1D1dpYiE7hhJLyKtMHSsfS9H4dHqhZkKI_4hut2CWwzElQ5g8E9XHcHvyCm7ZJr0bmQOPEDed6TfXVsGmEiQjVlkQ3tDrR9_RSbdd6fzg/s1600/photo+2(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">I sit here in my living room,
looking out at the view that I grew used to, but never indifferent to, and try
to wrap my head around the fact that 4 days from now it will no longer be my
view.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For six and a half years we’ve
enjoyed a breathtaking location in the best part of one of the most beautiful
cities on earth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sunrise, sunset, ocean,
beaches, Stanley Park, and of course, downtown Vancouver, set against the
backdrop of the North Shore mountains.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m sure there are better views around, but ours is pretty hard to
beat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our place has its flaws, lots of
them, but moving out of this apartment is extremely difficult.</a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtOR6UdN_4kfVkLt4LJg7FVo7hhlFDqd_bf1D1dpYiE7hhJLyKtMHSsfS9H4dHqhZkKI_4hut2CWwzElQ5g8E9XHcHvyCm7ZJr0bmQOPEDed6TfXVsGmEiQjVlkQ3tDrR9_RSbdd6fzg/s1600/photo+2(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtOR6UdN_4kfVkLt4LJg7FVo7hhlFDqd_bf1D1dpYiE7hhJLyKtMHSsfS9H4dHqhZkKI_4hut2CWwzElQ5g8E9XHcHvyCm7ZJr0bmQOPEDed6TfXVsGmEiQjVlkQ3tDrR9_RSbdd6fzg/s1600/photo+2(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">As hard as it is to move out of the
apartment, leaving my city is going to be even harder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve lived in Vancouver for 14 years, and in
that time it has become home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like my
country, it’s far from perfect, but there’s nowhere on earth I would rather
live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So many people see nothing but the
flaws in this city:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>it rains too much,
it’s too expensive, the people are cold and unfriendly; it might all be true
(although if you have a hard time talking to people, perhaps the first place to
look is in the mirror), but if all you’re going to focus on is the negatives,
then it doesn’t matter where you live, because everywhere has flaws.</a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtOR6UdN_4kfVkLt4LJg7FVo7hhlFDqd_bf1D1dpYiE7hhJLyKtMHSsfS9H4dHqhZkKI_4hut2CWwzElQ5g8E9XHcHvyCm7ZJr0bmQOPEDed6TfXVsGmEiQjVlkQ3tDrR9_RSbdd6fzg/s1600/photo+2(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">
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Two events over the last few years
made me realize just how much Vancouver had become my home, how much I cared
about my city.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first was the
Olympics, when we hosted the world in one of the highest profile events a city
and a country can hold.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like everyone
else, I watched in horror as tragedy struck even before the Games started, and
like everyone from around here, I was disappointed but not surprised as warm
weather and rain threatened to derail the events on opening weekend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Glitch Games, they were dubbed, possibly
the worst Olympics ever before we were three days in… at least that was
according to the London tabloids, those noteworthy purveyors of high-quality
journalism.</div>
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Even as all this was happening,
though, the feeling on the streets was different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All day, every day, the city was full of
people from all over the world, locals, tourists, officials, and athletes,
mixing together to give the city an atmosphere that gradually began to overcome
the initial problems.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By the final day,
as thousands gathered in the streets, celebrating the golden goal and breaking
into more spontaneous renditions of Oh Canada than I ever thought possible, the
question was no longer are these the worst games ever, but are they the best
ones to be held. .. and those of us from here no longer even cared that the
question was being asked.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had shown
the world our best: our beauty, our personality, our resilience, and our pride
of place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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Of course, that pride took a
beating not much more than a year later, as we showed the world the dark side
of our city.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After our Canucks took us
on a wild ride that sadly ended one win short of the promised land, the
frustration of a region (for as anyone who rode Skytrain or tried to drive into
the city that day can attest, it was far more than just Vancouver at work on
that night) boiled over, and was set ablaze by a few assholes intent only on
wreaking havoc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mob mentality took over,
and we watched in horror as our city’s storefronts, any vehicles in the mob’s
path, and our civic pride, were smashed and set ablaze by a few hundred
drunken, foolish people, even as thousands more stood aside and let it happen,
or caught it on their phones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sat at
home watching the news in disbelief, almost sick to my stomach as my city was
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Of course, even before the fires
had been put out, Vancouver was making plans to wipe this smear from its
streets, if not from its heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Thousands of people, armed with whatever cleaning supplies they could
gather, descended upon downtown to repair the damage, physical and
emotional.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I headed down as soon as I
could after work the next morning, and gladly joined in to help with the last
of the cleanup, and add my message to the others that appeared on the plywood
covering the broken windows on The Bay, and Chapters, and all the other stores
that had suffered at the hands of the mob.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Again and again, the same message appeared:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>THIS is my Vancouver.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not the mob from the night before, but this
one that had appeared in the morning, gathering to repair as best we could the
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And now, even as I sit in a living
room that has been almost emptied, looking at a stack of boxes that will soon
be loaded up and taken to a new city, I prepare to begin a new phase.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The timing seems perfect, considering the
milestone birthday that is three weeks away, and the pending start of my first
full school year as a teacher.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This new
life won’t include walking down the hill to go for a walk at Kits Beach, or
sitting on the deck watching the sun set over the ocean, but that’s ok… it will
include my family, and a budding career that I love, and a million new
adventures to find.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sad to leave,
but excited for a new start… it’s time.</div>
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<![endif]--><br />J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-9267871563992278182013-03-06T15:45:00.002-08:002013-03-06T15:46:09.082-08:00Daddy, What Was That?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;">
There was no
reason why that moment should have resonated with me more than any of the
million other questions a kid asks of their parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were playing cards, just before my
daughter went to bed, when the 9:00 gun went off in Stanley Park.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As she’s done so many times before, she
turned to me and asked, “Daddy, what was that?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As I answered the question, I was struck by the utter confidence she had
that I would know what the noise had been; her Daddy would know, that look
said, and he would explain it to her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;">
In a way that
moment was no big deal, just another question; and yet at the same time, it was
a microcosm of what parents go through countless times, every single day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our children look at us as the people who
solve problems, know things, and make things better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sooner or later (and it seems to be getting
sooner and sooner these days) they will realize that their parents don’t know
everything, can’t do everything, and can’t fix everything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We try to hold on to that illusion for as
long as we can, knowing that inevitably it will fade.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They will start to ask their friends, or
their teachers, or look it up on the phones that are becoming increasingly
ubiquitous, even in elementary schools (why an 11-year old needs to be texting
their friends at 10 AM on a Tuesday I’ll never understand, but that’s a
different post altogether).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;">
What I’m realizing
I need to do, as time passes, is to eventually replace that blind faith kids
have in their parents with clear-eyed trust and confidence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not a conditional parent, one that’s
there if it’s convenient, or when she’s making all the right decisions. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ll be there no matter what.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The questions will get more difficult, Daddy
will (sadly) become Dad, and my little girl will get bigger and bigger, there’s
nothing I can do about any of those things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What I hope never changes, what I will make sure as best I can never
changes, is the trust in her voice and on her face when she asks me those
inevitable questions.</div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-62635392182268134662013-01-02T22:47:00.000-08:002013-01-02T23:02:42.506-08:00A Word for 2013<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga1AQmZjdhUdUdt704tWdTjdjq1oMWw9gxcarPBdG7A6-lQOIvrnGeZVu-cbDVl5KYL9Qgnw2Oj5TfltOFw0MXxZVKWNr56QhI8Vh7jmOHpkOpwzkUguMxw6qkdsR69tTqObvXOzkEsrbO/s1600/photo(6).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
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<br />
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I sit here relaxing on the couch
with Lisa, after a long and enjoyable day with my little girl, another day
filled with the laughter and joy that always seem to mark my ‘Lizzie days.’<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This one felt extra-special, for some reason…
perhaps because it was a bonus day, an extra one that was a direct result of me
having the extended Christmas holidays that come with being a teacher.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am a teacher… those words still sound a
little weird, about as weird as the thought that I’m no longer a Starbucks
employee.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s awesome, amazing, still a
little scary at times, and still a little weird… not that I’d change it, of
course, but I’m not entirely used to it yet… 13 years is a long time.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
After putting Lizzie to bed, I was
puttering around on the computer, and saw my mom’s open question about people’s
word for 2013.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Words of inspiration, of
purpose, have never really been my thing, although I can certainly see the
value in them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not sure why I decided it was time to join
in on the conversation, although reading my Aunt Sherri’s blog about her word
for 2013 (<a href="http://sherrandmeyer.wordpress.com/2012/12/23/one-little-word/">peace)</a>
certainly played a part in my decision.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
The list of words people put down
as theirs for 2013 were amazing and inspiring:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>compassion, kindness, courage, respect, adventure… all great words, and
yet not words that struck a chord with me personally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At first the prospect seemed daunting… so
many words, so many possibilities.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And then
a word came to mind, one that in a way seemed perfect, but also one that I
thought I should look up, to see exactly what it meant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course, when I looked it up, it was
absolutely the perfect word for this year, for this point in my life.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
I’ve had a rough couple of years,
in some ways… struggles with work, with school, with time, with life in general
have at some points seemed overwhelming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I was buried by a lot of things, and getting through one day at a time
was often a struggle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Survive” seemed
to be the word of the year, again and again… but those days are behind me
now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The end of 2012 has seen a number
of changes in my life, and 2013 will see many more, but these are all positive
changes, changes of growth and opportunity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My days of surviving are behind me.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
With that thought in my head, I
looked up the word “thrive.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seemed
fitting, seemed like a good word for where I am right now, but I wanted to be
sure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It had a number of meanings, and
each one seemed better than the last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Make
steady progress”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Be at the high point
of one’s career or historical importance” “Grow vigorously.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
In so many ways I feel like I’m on
the verge of all those things, but especially the last.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am going to grow vigorously in 2013… do
more of the things that I love to do, get back to the things in my life that
bring me joy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was an avid skier for a while, but for some
reason that I can’t remember now, I got away from it… I’ve said for years that
I wanted to get back into it, but it’s not the cheapest activity in the world,
especially when you’re a full-time student with no ski equipment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Season after season passed, and each year I
said I hope next year is my year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well,
this year will be that year… I went up for the first time since the 90s last
week, and loved it… I’m going again on Friday, will buy my first season’s pass
later this year, and if all goes well will be taking Lisa and Lizzie up with me
by the end of the year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
It’s a small thing, in the big
picture, but it seems huge right now, because it’s so representative of where I
was, and where I am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wanted to ski for
years, but felt like I couldn’t, felt like it was an impossible dream,
something that I would maybe get to down the road, when things were
different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, they are different now,
and I couldn’t be happier about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To
hell with what happened before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am
exactly where I want to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s my year
to thrive.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga1AQmZjdhUdUdt704tWdTjdjq1oMWw9gxcarPBdG7A6-lQOIvrnGeZVu-cbDVl5KYL9Qgnw2Oj5TfltOFw0MXxZVKWNr56QhI8Vh7jmOHpkOpwzkUguMxw6qkdsR69tTqObvXOzkEsrbO/s1600/photo(6).JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga1AQmZjdhUdUdt704tWdTjdjq1oMWw9gxcarPBdG7A6-lQOIvrnGeZVu-cbDVl5KYL9Qgnw2Oj5TfltOFw0MXxZVKWNr56QhI8Vh7jmOHpkOpwzkUguMxw6qkdsR69tTqObvXOzkEsrbO/s320/photo(6).JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-46199040240012784662012-10-04T13:38:00.001-07:002012-10-04T13:38:04.530-07:00Connections<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
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<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I heard a
really cool story from a customer the other day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She’s recently gone back to school, and her
cohort spent a week together on campus essentially getting to know each
other.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The major theme of the week was
“Connections,” and the students had to bring a meaningful gift to share with an
assigned partner in the group.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Over the
course of the week, they shared stories about themselves and their lives,
opening up to each other as the days passed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
One of the women in the group
eventually shared her history as an Olympic athlete, who had competed in two
recent Games.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had lost her father
years ago, but had kept his memory with her over the intervening years by
carrying, no matter where she went, a gift that he had given her… a piece of
the Berlin Wall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As she travelled the
globe, competing at the highest level sport has to offer, this piece of the
wall went everywhere with her… until earlier this year, when somehow she lost
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The woman, as you can imagine, was
devastated.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
As I mentioned earlier, each person
in the group had brought a gift to share with their assigned partner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Care to guess what the random person she was
paired up with had brought for his partner?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That’s right… a piece of the Berlin Wall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of all the millions of things he could have
chosen to bring; heck, of all the different people within the group that she
could have been paired up with.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have
no idea what the odds against something like that happening are, but the number
is big… like really, really big.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s
kinda spooky, really, although things like this happen every day, all over the
place… we’re just not always aware of them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Are they evidence of that universal guiding force, creating moments like
this all over the place?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perhaps,
although with the number of interactions between people that happen every day,
things like this are bound to occur.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Regardless of your take, it really is a small, connected world, and one
that is getting smaller and more connected as time goes by.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
The whole connections theme she
talked about really got me thinking… not so much about connections in the spiritual
sense, but about the smaller, more everyday connections that we make, or don’t
make, on a regular basis.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
I’ve been working for Starbucks for
a really, really, ridiculously long time… almost exactly a third of my
life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d have never guessed when I
started how long I would last with the company, and in a lot of ways it’s been
waaaaay too long.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That said, it’s been
pretty good for me in a lot of ways, and to this day there are still parts of
it that I really enjoy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I said to
someone recently, the customers are the best part of the job… and, often, the
worst part of it as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve got some
amazing pain-in-the-ass customer stories from my years<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>( my favorite is still the woman who couldn’t
understand why I made her take her two dogs, strapped to her chest in a
snuggly, out of the store when, and I quote, “these dogs are far cleaner than
you (me) will ever be!!!”), but they really are few and far between.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Way more common are the people who you see
every morning, on their way to their jobs, construction workers and lawyers,
doctors and nannies, students and movie stars… is there anything more
democratic, more universal, than the morning cup of coffee?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
The conversations move at varying
speeds, 30 seconds at a time, but they all travel the same route… from “what
can we do for you this morning” to “it’s a grande dark, right?” to “the usual,
Marty?” to “hey, Jess, how was your trip?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Survived travelling with the kids, did you?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Impersonal and business-like becomes
friendly, as connections are made, and in some cases strengthened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Over the years I’ve gone for beers with
customers, added a few of them on Facebook (random aside… I’m shocked that Word
didn’t recognize Facebook as an actual word), even gotten interviews and jobs
through connections that I made at Starbucks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Every time I go out and about in my neighbourhood, I run into someone,
or often many someones, that I know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
What’s amazing to me is that I live
in a city that has an incredibly strong reputation as a place where those
connections are hard to make.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vancouver,
apparently, is a totally shut down city where people stay in their own little
bubbles, heads down, earphones on, carefully getting from A to B without ever
actually making eye contact with anyone, and god forbid you actually speak to
someone you don’t know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe I’m the
anomaly, but that’s never been my experience of this, or any other place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maritimers are renowned for being friendly,
down-to-earth people, the opposite of we Vancouverites… and while I didn’t find
that to be wrong, people were really friendly there, I didn’t find it to be all
that different from here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People are
people, in my experience, no matter where they’re from… accents are different,
some customs change, but people are people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
Not too far down the road, I’m
going to be leaving Starbucks behind, finally.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My teaching career is about to fully engage, and I’ll move, on, leaving
the green apron behind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It will be
interesting to see how that changes my life; without those forced, every day
connections, will I slowly start to see the Vancouver everyone else does?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is the job what makes my experience
different, or is it something in me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Who
knows, I guess, the only way to answer a question like that is to wait and
see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d be surprised, though… maybe
it’s the small town in me, maybe it’s an inherent friendliness that others pick
up on, or maybe it’s my considerable charm and devastating good looks… ok, definitely
not that last one, but I think the first two fit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am making a choice to keep those
connections going, and continue to make new ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why not?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Really, what is there to lose, by trying to be a friendly face to the
world?</div>
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-1178399568499056242012-09-30T15:55:00.004-07:002012-09-30T15:55:52.858-07:00Possibilities The other day, it finally happened: after years out
of school, more years back at school, and what felt like eons waiting to
get hired by a school, I got hired to join the family business. I am
now, officially, a working teacher, having had my first day of work
yesterday. To paraphrase the recently deceased Neal Armstrong, it was
at once a tiny step and great leap; nothing so dramatic as a walk on the
moon, in the grand scheme of things, and yet as profound a moment in my
life as those first steps on the moon were in his. A new landscape has
been opened, a new world is mine to explore and discover.<br />
The journey to this point has been an… interesting one, in
many ways, and yet every step (or in the moment, mis-step) has led me
to exactly this point. There are many in this world who tell you
everything happens for a reason… many others who don’t buy the idea that
we are being guided in our path. I’m not sure where I fit in that
debate; my answer will change depending on the day, the moment;
sometimes it seems like there must be a plan, and yet at other times I
wonder how there could be. There are so many horrible, catastrophic
things that happen in this world, big and small, that I almost hope it
is random, for I don’t know if I want to be at the whim of some guiding
force that at times has such a cruel, sadistic sense of humour.<br />
Regardless of how I got here (and really, does it matter
how we got here? We’re here, wherever here is, let’s make the best of
it), I know that here, right here, is the perfect place for me to be. I
am about to embark on an amazing career path, one that I am excited
about for a million reasons. It is rewarding; it is challenging,
exciting, important, difficult at times and effortless at others… many,
many more things that I will continue to discover for the rest of my
working life. That, above all, is what I look forward to; the knowledge
that I will be discovering new things day in and day out, for however
long I stay in the classroom. Teaching is many things, but it is never
boring, never routine, for those who dare to challenge themselves, and
never let it become boring or routine. I grew up in a house with two
great examples of that… well, actually, five great examples of that, as
all of us are following in the footsteps of parents who love what they
do, and are damn good at it, to boot.<br />
There were times over the last year and a half since I
graduated that I wondered if this day would ever happen, if this career
would ever get started. Application after application ended with one
of two responses, that in a way were one response; either total and
complete silence, which is a sad reality of this saturated teaching
market, with hundreds or thousands of applicants vying for every job,
making it impractical to respond unless the news is good; or, on the
rare occasion where I did get through the initial onslaught of
applicants, I got the honour of hearing an actual, personal “no.” It
was maddening, frustrating, disappointing… then, eventually, it became
disheartening. I kept telling people that it was just a matter of time,
that it was bound to happen sooner or later, but I stopped believing
it. I have a lot of good relationships with customers at Starbucks,
people that I talk to every day, and have gotten to know pretty well; I
began to curse those relationships, as each and every one asked, and
asked, and asked, how the job hunt was going, if anything was
happening. The forced smile got more and more difficult, the fake cheer
harder and harder to muster, as I told them what I knew deep down
wasn’t true; that it would happen soon. I forgot what may be the two
most important words in the English language: “I could.”<br />
I have come to realize the importance of these words
over the last month or so. I’m a supremely logical person, one who can
see all sides of most arguments even if I don’t necessarily believe
them, and am hard to shake off of a position once I arrive at one. I
looked at the numbers, looked at what I had to offer on paper, and came
to the conclusion that I was going to be one of those who never got a
shot. Sometimes it’s who you know, sometimes it’s what you know… in a
lot of places these days, you need to know someone to even get a chance
to show what you know, and it seemed like the few people I knew were in
the wrong place, or weren’t enough to give me a chance to show what I
knew. How do you stand out, in a cover letter and resume, from the 500,
or 1000, or 10000, other people who have almost exactly the same
qualifications that you do? I couldn’t figure it out, and I almost
stopped trying. Would have, if my wife would have let me. Fortunately,
she didn’t.<br />
I had forgotten that I had possibilities, that I had
choices I could make. I could doesn’t have to mean I will… it just
means that I have options, if I want them. I could go to law school.
Maybe it doesn’t make sense for me, maybe I will choose not to… but I
could. I could volunteer in a number of schools, make more and better
connections in Vancouver to get a job here. I don’t think I want to
work for the VSB, the district and the process here seem broken, to me…
but I could. I’m working in Chilliwack, and commuting from Kits. I
don’t think I want to do this for more than a little while… but I
could. I have options, and I see them now… really, I always did, I just
couldn’t, or didn’t, see them.<br />
There are always options in life. Hate your job?
There are lots of them out there, and people change them every day. It
might be hard, it might be scary… but you could do it. Don’t like where
you live? There are lots of places in this world, and many of them are
amazing… go check them out. I hear people complain about the rain in
Vancouver literally every single day it rains, which as we all know is
many. This an amazing city, one that has a million things going for it,
one that I love… but it rains. A lot. If you can’t deal with that,
there are lots of places that get less rain. Winnipeg gets way more sun
than we do… why not move there?<br />
I have a lot of things that I want to start doing again,
now that I’m teaching; I want to ski, I want to golf, I want to coach…
most importantly, I want to spend more time with my family. Time off
with Lisa, and waaaay more time with Lizzie, are two huge reasons why I
chose this career. Finally, I’m going to start to make time to write.
It’s something that I’ve been pretty good at all my life, and want to
explore that some more. Will I ever do more than putter with it, do it
for the enjoyment of it? Probably not.<br />
<br />
But I could.J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-25626931794935099892012-09-30T15:55:00.002-07:002012-09-30T15:55:09.755-07:00Gravity We hear a lot these days about staying grounded,
staying in the moment; how important it is that we take each moment as
it comes, and don’t get bogged down with woulda, coulda, stuff that
happened in the past and can’t be changed, however much we wish it
could. I think that as you go through life, many of us are lucky enough
to find someone who can help us with that, that anchor who ties us to
the now, keeps us from playing “what-if” too often. I see that in my
parents’ relationship, have witnessed it my whole life, and I think that
I finally have that mirrored in my own. Life can get rough, and very
tricky at times, but that anchor can keep you tied to where you want to
be, where you should be.<br />
Families have anchors, as
well; that one central figure that holds everyone together, keeps you
from drifting too far apart as you all make your own way in life. It is
far too easy to get caught up in the day to day, caught up in your own
little world, and lose touch with those who are an important part of
your life. Weeks become months become years, and before you know it
it’s been far too long without seeing someone who you care about. The
gravity of that central figure keeps you in orbit around them, so even
as you move in your own life, you are kept in contact with others around
that same figure.<br />
My family lost that central figure
almost twenty years ago now. My Papa passed away in 1994, far too soon
despite his 85 years. I’ve now lived almost half my life without him,
and yet he still looms so large in my thoughts; I see his shadow in my
Dad, a legacy that I long to live up to in my own life, as a father, and
as a man. That legacy is intimidating at times, as I find my own way
in life, but I know both Dad and Papa are there for me, supporting me
every step of the way.<br />
Since Papa died, his family has
certainly drifted apart, at least from where we were. I still see my
family on occasion, and thoroughly enjoy their company when we get
together, but the gaps in between are larger and larger as time goes
on. While it’s often like we’ve never been apart, children get older,
lives change, and we drift. The last few years weddings and milestone
birthdays have served to bring us together, but there aren’t likely to
be any more of those in the very near future; we will need to find our
own reasons to keep in touch.<br />
This past weekend was a
time for me where I felt that pull very strongly. Seeing almost the
entire Watson family I felt his presence with me the entire trip.
Driving by the old house in Cumberland, showing Lizzie where her Grampa
grew up; the house that Papa bought when he came back from the war, that
he lived in for the rest of his life. Stopping for donuts at the
bakery up the street, as we did when we were kids. Of course, it’s no
longer Auchterlone’s, and the donuts just don’t measure up to my
memories; I’m not sure that they could, to be honest, no matter how good
they are. Childhood memories like that are hard to beat.<br />
Getting up to Gold River after faaaaar too many years, I felt him
again. My last time there was a fishing trip to Friendly Cove, where
Dad and I went with Papa, Shane and Brian. My first time on the open
ocean was my first time getting seasick, as apparently growing up in
Agassiz didn’t prepare my stomach to handle the up and down, up and
down, up and down of fishing out there. We caught a couple cod that
day, and Brian filleted one of them on the spot, tossing the rest of the
fish out of the boat to be picked up by a circling bald eagle. That
day was very firmly imprinted on my memory, and returning to the place
brought it all back more strongly than I could have guessed.<br />
I felt the pull of family this weekend, and felt as strongly as ever
how lucky I am to be part of such a friendly, loving, generous family.
The Comox Valley felt like a long lost home; I haven’t lived there in 34
years (god that makes me feel old), but it was so familiar, so full of
memories, that for the first time I understood how my parents longed to
go back there after so long away. Home is where your family is, where
your roots are; my parents have provided that for so long in the Fraser
Valley, it has always been home. And yet, as time passes away from
there, I realize that without them, Agassiz holds little pull these
days. I’ll drive through it on occasion forever, probably, drive by the
old houses where I lived and see how the town is doing, but even now it
feels more like somewhere I was, once, and less like home. Home is
Vancouver, now, but I suddenly feel like that could change someday, as
well. Who knows, I could eventually follow my parents over to the
island. After a long time away, I suddenly feel that gravity again.<br />
<br />
I missed it.<br />
<span class=""></span><br />
<span class=""></span><br />
<span class=""><img alt="" class="photo_img img" src="https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/s720x720/318748_10151089097786212_1925372721_n.jpg" /></span>J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-83059123508763649222012-09-30T15:54:00.000-07:002012-09-30T15:54:09.913-07:00Father's Day Thoughts<span>I never knew my Papa’s father… I think he passed away before I was
born, but maybe it happened during my lifetime, just before I can
remember. Either way, there’s a sense of loss there, for he had to have
been a great father, and great grandfather, and great-grandfather (ok,
now this is getting confusing… should have chosen a word other than
great).<br /> Anyways, it might seem to be a bit of a stretch, assuming
all these things of a man I never met; but only if you never met my
Papa. I’ve said before that hero is probably the right word to describe
him, in my eyes. I grew up in an extended family that was very close,
and he was the centre of that, the glue that held that family together, a
fact that unfortunately was made all too clear in the years after he
passed away. We are still close, but since Papa left us it just hasn’t
been the same.<br /> Papa in his younger days was a star athlete and a
great student, and the fact that he went away to UBC and then came back
to little Cumberland has always stood out to me; here was a man who
could have gone anywhere, done anything, but he went back to his roots,
became principal of the school in town, and remained active in the
community until the day he died. Family, community, these were what
mattered, something he passed on to his children. He coached sports
throughout his teaching career, including a stretch coaching Dad’s youth
basketball team; sports, and family, a combination that has certainly
been passed down. He was there at many of my key sports moments; the
one of these that most sticks out in my head was when my basketball
team, with Dad as coach, won the provincial championship, with Nanny and
Papa in the stands.<br /> With Papa as a role model, it might seem like a
given that my father would be the same, but such things can never be
taken for granted, especially when you consider that I was born when Dad
was just 19. I can’t imagine having that kind of responsibility at
that age, and in so many situations these days that is a recipe for
disaster; kids, having kids. Fortunately for me, this wasn’t any 19
year-old.<br /> Growing up, he was that perfect combination of parent and
big brother, a playmate when I needed one, and yet an authority figure
when he needed to be. Basketball, softball, golf, tennis, you name it
he would play it with us (and beat us at it, a trend that faded far too
late in life). The coaching gene had apparently been passed to him, as
well, and all of us grew up in the Agassiz High gym, learning to dribble
a basketball soon after we learned to walk. Once we began to play
organized sports, he coached us if he could, if we wanted him to, and to
this day he remains the best coach I ever had. Other coaches screamed
and yelled and punished their players for mistakes, forced them to
memorize plays, sucked the fun out of the game; he made us want to play,
let us have fun while giving us the tools to be successful at the same
time, and almost never raised his voice; and of course, when you never
yell, it makes the times you do far more effective, as anyone who has
been on the receiving end of his anger will attest to.<br /> He coaching
style and his parenting style are very similar, and I guess in a way
that makes sense, they are different degrees of the same role; sports
coach versus life coach. Patient, fun, allowing you room to make
mistakes, and there to help you through them when you do; for as many
times as I’m sure I disappointed him while growing up, I can not think
of a single time where he disappointed me. You know, I don’t think
there are very many people in this world who can say that about their
parents; until I wrote that, I had never really thought about it, which
I’m pretty sure makes it true. <br /> This all started in my head the
other day, when Lisa and Lizzie were making a Father’s Day card for me,
and Lizzie saw a picture of a trophy with some writing on it; she asked
Lisa what it said, so Lisa read it for her: “World’s Greatest Dad.”
Lizzie responded: “Let’s use that one, because he is the greatest dad in
the world.” I teared up a little bit when Lisa told me that, even as I
thought Lizzie was wrong… she doesn’t have the greatest Dad in the
world, I do, and I think if he read this my Dad would probably say the
same thing. Three generations in a row thinking that they’ve got the
greatest dad in the world is an amazing thing; and if Lizzie is still
thinking the same thing 30 years from now then maybe I’ve fulfilled the
legacy that I have been handed. <br />I miss you Papa. <br />Thank you Dad.<br />Happy Father’s Day. <br />I love you both.</span><br />
<span>June 20, 2010 </span>J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-78819903933991449282012-09-29T13:03:00.001-07:002020-02-12T20:22:57.205-08:00Let's Keep Painting the Town RedAs long as I can remember, I’ve always felt like I had the extreme
fortune to be born in the best country on earth. I’ve always described
myself as an extremely proud Canadian, something that often seemed to
put me in the minority. At least in this regard, (and many would
probably argue in many regards) I’ve never felt the ‘Canadian reserve’
that has so often been used to describe our people, and I’ve often
wished that we were not so self-conscious, so self-deprecating, that we
would stand up and lay claim to what I’ve always felt was our rightful
position as one of the world’s great nations. Not great powers (the US,
Russia, China, they can battle over who belongs on that list), but
great nations; beautiful, friendly, concerned with our citizens and
those of the world at large, willing to take a stand on issues that are
deemed important. Not perfect, not even close, but willing to admit to
our imperfections, and take measures to fix them.
<br /> Maybe that’s why I’ve always been such a huge fan of the Olympics;
in a country where flag-waving is often seen as unseemly, seen as
something too American (and ‘not American’ has always been one of the
ways we have defined ourselves), this was a chance to wave the flag, to
cheer on our athletes, even as they so often struggled for success on
the world stage. To me, perhaps the single most definitive Olympic
moment (at least until Sidney’s goal) was Simon Whitfield standing on
top of the Olympic podium, tears streaming down his face as he sang
along with O Canada. That, to me, has always been the pinnacle of
success, listening to your anthem because you were the best in the world
at what you did. Outside of hearing Lizzie first cry, I can’t imagine too many better feelings.
<br /> Because of this, seeing the flags, the crowds, the sea of red that
spread across the city and the country over the last couple of weeks has
been absolutely amazing. Considering the apparent mixed sentiments
towards the games that Vancouver and BC held, no one could have
predicted how we would rise up and embrace the Games, but embrace them
we did. Our ‘Glitch Games’, described by some as the worst ever a scant
two days in, overcame tragedy on the backs of the thousands of people
who jammed the streets, the concerts, the actual events, until our
athletes overcame their first week struggles and crowned the games with
final weekend triumph. Alex Bilodeau broke the drought, but to me the
turning point was Virtue and Moir, opening the floodgates that kept the
rings in Coal Harbour gold for most of the final week, culminating in a
moment that will live in Canadian history, as some 25 million of us
watched the hockey team claim gold, and then seemingly all converged on
the corner of Granville and Robson to celebrate, peacefully for once.
So many times those “where were you when…” moments are defined by
tragedies; this was one of those, and it was in triumph.
<br /> Let’s do ourselves, and our country, a favour; let’s take this love
of our country that we rediscovered, or just made public, and run with
it, carry it forward. Let’s not let beer commercials be the only things
that stir our pride; let’s not put on our Canada gear (and kudos to HBC
for giving us gear worth wearing) and pick up our flags every couple of
years, when the Olympics are on or our hockey team is playing; let’s
wear our hearts on our sleeves every day. Not over the top, not in your
face, not over the line that our American cousins cross too frequently;
just confident, and proud, of who we are and where we are from. Let’s
not make these two weeks something that happened, once. Let’s make them
something that changed us, forever.
J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-27126173826057033332011-12-07T16:11:00.000-08:002011-12-07T16:15:35.912-08:00Dear Lizzie<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" latentstylecount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal">Dear Lizzie:</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Not sure if, or when, you’ll see this, or appreciate it, but I think this is somewhat selfishly more for me than you.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Time is passing by so quickly, so amazingly, frighteningly, quickly, that I want to get this down while it still fits.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>As I gradually see things we have always done fade into the past, as you grow taller, grow up, the sense I need to hold to every single moment just gets stronger and stronger.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">You are an amazing, brilliant little girl, although even now the little seems a bit dated.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>So smart, so kind, so thoughtful… if I could have listed all of the qualities I wanted my child to have, you would have all of them, and then some.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>You are so artistic, happiest when you are creating; I see that in my family, but I guess it skipped me.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Fortunately for all of this, it came out, and then some, in you.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The things you make are always amazing; I know part of that is a proud father talking, but only a very small part.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Another, bigger part is the love that is in all of it; you make these things because you love to, and because you want the people you give them to to know that you love them.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Just the other day, when we pulled out our Christmas decorations and the “Family” plaque you made was in there, it struck me again how special you are; not an infrequent occurrence, of course, but that was one of the more notable times it hit me.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Two huge things struck me this past weekend, as well, two signs that you are growing up (and up and up and up!)<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The first was a physical thing; we went to leave, and you very casually, easily, unlocked the front door, on that deadbolt way up near the top of the door.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I remember how little you were when we moved in, how far away that lock seemed from your little hand, and it makes me a little sad.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Once again we had the “you need to stop growing” conversation, one that we both know the silliness of, but<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I don’t think you get how serious I am when I say it.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Of course I want you to grow up, I can’t wait to see the amazing person you are going to grow into, but part of me just wants to keep you how you are, every time I see you.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I will never forget the time we had that conversation, and you told me: Daddy, I’m going to keep growing, but I’ll always be your little girl.”<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>So true, so poignant… and in a way, so sad.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The other thing that struck me was one of those small details, something you probably didn’t notice in the moment.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Every time we send you to go get ready for bed, put your pajamas on, you grab my hand and bring me with you.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I know you don’t need the help getting ready, but I think it’s just one of those little daddy-Lizzie things that you like… and I love.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>This past Friday, I sent you to get ready for bed, and off you went.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>No pause, no reaching for my hand, you just went and got ready.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I don’t know if it will be a trend, or just a one-off, but the day will come, and possibly soon, where that will be how it is.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>You will be too big, too grown-up, to have your Dad (not Daddy, Dad) help you change.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The closer that day gets, and I know it’s not too far away now, the more I dread it.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">It’s funny, as I sit here writing this a customer at Starbucks I know well stopped to chat, and he is off to join his daughter to celebrate her 27<sup>th</sup> Birthday.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>We had a brief conversation about how quickly time passes, and he brought up that day in the future when boys will enter the picture… I shut that down in a hurry.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I know it will come, way too fast, but I’d rather not think about it for now.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">There are times where I think you recognize what I’m talking about here, and even feel the same way yourself.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Maybe it’s just<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>wishful thinking, but every time you throw yourself on me, or want to be picked up like you always have, it hits me; I’m probably the only person still doing that.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>You are too big to be picked up, to be carried by your mom these days, and you seem to miss it; the times I pick you up and you snuggle in, arms and legs dangling because you are so big, I sense that you don’t want that to be in the past any more than I do.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I promise you, I’ll continue as long as I can…<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I hope that my ability to carry outlasts your need to be carried.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I’ll do my best.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">In a way, I guess that sentiment sums up what I’m trying to say here:<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I’ll do my best.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I’m one of the lucky few that has had a father (and a mother) that I knew I could always count on, no matter what.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Everyone deserves that in life, but so few actually get it; you will.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I can’t fix everything, the fact that you are still making monthly visits to Children’s removed that idea from my head, but you will never have to wonder if I love you, if you are important to me.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I think that is already obvious to you, it seems to be, but I promise you a lifetime of the same.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>It is exactly what you deserve.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I love you Magoo</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Daddy<a name="_GoBack"></a></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> </p> <p class="MsoNormal"> </p>J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8566693910991808649.post-72858761726605261782011-03-26T19:21:00.000-07:002011-03-27T17:22:34.982-07:00<div style="TEXT-ALIGN: center"><span style="font-size:180%;">If You Let Me Play</span> </div><br /><p>The first time I came across Nike's "If You Let Me Play" ad campaign was in the mid-1990s, when my mom came home from a teaching conference with this poster. <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA2Pq5m0QUP9wtdf1jzNjqFotJvXoR2t9ukxAABdDj9Ae7IVowYAJUsbm9h1ylbBi5hg0_BtAJDag6675ZqXXOd_MK4FP0ZNiHzMcyqrEhpj7__ikbE9t84MnUexUDTjV4g4ITANBR915-/s1600/If+you+let+me+play.bmp"><img style="MARGIN: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; WIDTH: 242px; FLOAT: right; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5588572144292019730" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA2Pq5m0QUP9wtdf1jzNjqFotJvXoR2t9ukxAABdDj9Ae7IVowYAJUsbm9h1ylbBi5hg0_BtAJDag6675ZqXXOd_MK4FP0ZNiHzMcyqrEhpj7__ikbE9t84MnUexUDTjV4g4ITANBR915-/s320/If+you+let+me+play.bmp" /></a>The print on the poster is difficult to read in this image, but its text has a simple, yet extremely powerful, message. The text reads: </p><br /><p>If You Let Me Play </p><br /><p>I will like myself more </p><br /><p>I will have more self-confidence </p><br /><p>I will suffer less depression </p><br /><p>I will be 60% less likely to get breast cancer </p><br /><p>I will be more likely to leave a man who beats me </p><br /><p>I will be less likely to get pregnant before I want to </p><br /><p>I will learn what it means to be strong </p><br /><p>If you let me play sports. </p><br /><p>Soon after I saw the poster, I saw the television ad for the first time. It reiterated the message from the poster, with a very simple, powerful format... no music, no effects, just little girls looking into the camera and telling the audience how to make their lives better. Here is the television commercial:</p><br /><p><iframe title="YouTube video player" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/AQ_XSHpIbZE" frameborder="0" width="480" allowfullscreen=""></iframe></p><br /><p>Growing up with parents who coached a number of sports, and three sisters who all played university sports, I saw first-hand the power of sport. My sisters are all strong, grounded women, and I firmly believe that growing up playing sports has contributed to that.</p><br /><p>The issue became even more important to me when my daughter was born; I fully intended that she be given the opportunity to play sports. Her options down that road became somewhat limited a couple of years ago, however, when she was diagnosed with a blood disorder that greatly restricts her blood's ability to clot. Any sort of contact sport went out the window at that point in time; still, there are a number of sports that she can take part in, including tennis and swimming, and I am determined that she will be able to play sports, if she chooses.</p><br /><p>Using a number of the resources we have touched upon over the length of this course, I am going to go into some detail about how and why these ideas are important for children, especially females.</p><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">TAGXEDO </span></strong><br /><p></p><br /><p>I first used the transcript of the television commercial to complete a word web, using the website <a href="http://www.tagxedo.com/">http://www.tagxedo.com/</a>. It's not the first word-web site I have come across (<a href="http://www.wordle.com/">http://www.wordle.com/</a>) is another good one, but it is the easiest to use; in fact, my wife used it to create a number of birthday cards for friends, within days of being shown the site.User-friendly, and extremely useful as well.</p><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 377px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 294px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5588823273488061154" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc-eVCwQ3hfwDtqYi1FhSRZ45AEP5ZDf_u4mLXgDbpxKOqFSkBWZB2XbNmvhTgPD16Zcrh8v9-ML_SMRLcxV3cvZ9xC-yveg4lRZb7DbvdWthwoP2YTtIdZGVXbNH0eLsI9xUKiUnFcgVJ/s320/Tagzedo_If_you_let_me_play.jpg" /> <br /><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtFTHYDg_UrQJK0t0xZyejDYh1p9vTB86uWSNmDxWzeYo-koCYghSzlG5UmNLq5NPY_Hct-ZcVEqRc2MS5d6mcMciPmY1y_1F7gv0OXNRUpT1cR9a10WyyY78ahthreVUdiHa1VCYVvbDX/s1600/Avatar.bmp.jpg"></a></p><br /><p>I was extremely happy with how this web turned out... the words I wanted were highlighted, and I think the intended message is the one that comes through.</p><strong>BODY IMAGE AND AVATARS </strong><br /><p>In today's world, we are constantly assaulted by images that show what a woman is 'supposed' to look like: rail thin, scantily dressed, and usually highly sexualized. Even as women's rights are in many ways at an all-time high, expectationson women are in the same spot; today's women holds down a full-time job, manages her home and her family, and looks great doing it. That is the standard that is being held up, and the fact that it is a construction not based in reality does not matter; if you are not Martha Stewart in the body of Brooklyn Decker, then what is wrong with you? You still look like you had a baby 2 months after your child was born? Do you not care about yourself? It's no wonder that anorexia is at an all-time high, along with divorce rates. We are a society where Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton, while universally mocked, are also universally held up to be admired: stupid, shallow, beautiful women who are famous for... well, for being rich and stupid, really.</p><br /><p>That image of what a woman, or girl, should look and dress like is everywhere, can not be escaped. Even animated images of women look like them; this became clear when we tried to create avatars for this class. Liz complained that all of her avatars from one site were inappropriate to use, and she was not joking. I went into IMVU to create an avatar, and every option they had was young, beautiful, thin, and underdressed. Here was the finished product I ended up with.. </p><br /><p><img style="WIDTH: 171px; HEIGHT: 325px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5588847900681512514" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtFTHYDg_UrQJK0t0xZyejDYh1p9vTB86uWSNmDxWzeYo-koCYghSzlG5UmNLq5NPY_Hct-ZcVEqRc2MS5d6mcMciPmY1y_1F7gv0OXNRUpT1cR9a10WyyY78ahthreVUdiHa1VCYVvbDX/s320/Avatar.bmp.jpg" /></p><br /><p>This image of what a female is supposed to look like is absolutely horrifying ; the thought that in a few years my 6-year old daughter will be dressing like this, wanting to look like this, terrifies me. I have to do my best to instill in her a sense of self-confidence, a sense of self-esteem that will ensure that even as she goes through the pressure and drama of her teenage years, she has learned enough to make the right decisions, decisions that I will be unable to make for her, at least actively.</p><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">ATHLETES AS ROLE MODELS </span></strong><br /><p>I have always come out very strongly in opposition to the idea that athletes should be held to a higher standard of behaviour than society in general; a society where Kobe Bryant or Terrell Owens are held up as the standard we should try to emulate is one that is in serious trouble.</p><br /><p>That said, there are certainly facets of almost every professional athlete that can be admired, and taken to heart. To become the best in the world at anything, not matter how talented one is, takes years of hard work and dedication to your craft, whatever that craft may be. Kobe Bryant can be admired for how hard he has worked at his game, for his determination to be the best basketball player ever, even as his off-court problems can be condemned. </p><br /><p>Within the same context, there are many female athletes who can be admired by girls young and old for certain things that they do, and do well. Serena Williams has done some regrettable things in her life, but she has also succeeded in a sport that is historically almost entirely rich and caucsasian, despite coming from a low-income, African-American family. As well, she has shown the world that it is possible to be muscular, strong, and sexy, blowing away many stereotypes in the process. I see the downside of this, as well... she, like many others, has been seen as a sexual object, but I would certainly rather my daughter attempt to become strong, fit and sexy than to starve herself to be seen as attractive. Mia Hamm, to me, is one of those few athletes who deserves the title of role model; intelligent, classy, a great ahtlete, if you are going to emulate an athlete you could do far worse than her.</p><br /><p>I included both of these women in my next artifact; a Glogster page (<a href="http://www.glogster.com/">http://www.glogster.com/</a>). While not the easiest site to work with, there were a number of handy, interesting tools in this site, and I am happy with the finished product.</p><br /><p>The third woman I included on the Glogster page is not nearly as famous as either of the first two, but the story is a lot more personal to me. Kaila Mussell is the younger sister of an old friend of mine, a woman who I first met when she was 12 years old. She has since become the first female saddle-bronc rider in North America, and was featured in a music video by country legend Reba McEntire. I knew her as a strong (physically and mentally), determined teenager; she has obviously kept all of those qualities as she has grown up.</p><br /><p></p>Here is the Glogster page: <br /><p></p><br /><p><img style="WIDTH: 0px; HEIGHT: 0px; VISIBILITY: hidden" border="0" src="http://c.gigcount.com/wildfire/IMP/CXNID=2000002.0NXC/bT*xJmx*PTEzMDEyNTMxNzU2MDkmcHQ9MTMwMTI1MzE4ODQ2OCZwPTIyMTYzMSZkPSZnPTImbz1kY2YwMDA1NzRhNGM*NGUwOTgz/ZjZiMDljZTE1OWUwNSZvZj*w.gif" width="0" height="0" /><embed height="514" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="380" src="http://www.glogster.com/flash/flash_loader.swf?ver="" allowfullscreen="true" allownetworking="all" allowscriptacces="always" wmode="window" flashvars="sl=http://www.glogster.com/flash/glog.swf?ver=1301072923&gi=17575980&ui=7185267&li=3&fu=http://www.glogster.com/flash/&su=http://www.glogster.com/connector/&fn=http://www.glogster.com/fonty/&embed=true&pu=http://www.glogster.com/blog-thumbs//17/57/59/17575980_2.jpg&google_analytics_url=http://www.glogster.com/js/glogsterGA.js&si=x&gw=3,8,0&gh=5,1,4"></embed> </p><br /><p><a href="http://jasonwatson.glogster.com/glog-9455/">http://jasonwatson.glogster.com/glog-9455/</a></p><br /><p></p><br /><p><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">YOUTUBE SEARCHSTORIES</span></strong></p>I came across this tool a few months ago, when it was used to make fun of a certain former Vancouver Canuck. While the first one I saw was very funny, I certainly saw its potential to be used in a more serious way. I plugged a number of the ideas from the Nike commercial, and after a little playing around I was happy with the end product; you can also choose your own music, from a number of options. These mini-movies can be created at <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/SearchStories">http://www.youtube.com/user/SearchStories</a>. <br /><p></p><br /><p><iframe title="YouTube video player" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/-7dRXjYDF0A" frameborder="0" width="640"></iframe></p><br /><p></p><br /><p><br /><p></p><span style="font-size:130%;">VANCOUVER YOUTH SPORTS </span><br /><p></p><br /><p>Finally, I have included links to a number of kids' sports programs across Vancouver. We are in an area where virtually any and every sport is available for children, but it can sometimes be difficult to find a starting point; well, here it is.</p><br /><p>Golf:</p><br /><p>BC Golf Junior Links: <a href="http://www.bcgolfpages.com/juniorgolf.php">http://www.bcgolfpages.com/juniorgolf.php</a></p><br /><p>Soccer:</p><br /><p>Vancouver Youth Soccer Association: <a href="http://www.vysa.ca/">http://www.vysa.ca/</a> Burnaby Girls Soccer Club: <a href="http://www.burnabygirlssoccerclub.com/">http://www.burnabygirlssoccerclub.com/</a></p><br /><p>Tennis:</p><br /><p>Tennis BC Schools Program: <a href="http://www.tennisbc.org/community/schoolsprogram">http://www.tennisbc.org/community/schoolsprogram</a> Kitsilano Community Centre Tennis Lessons: <a href="http://www.kitscc.com/activity/child/outdoor-sports">http://www.kitscc.com/activity/child/outdoor-sports</a></p><br /><p>Basketball:</p><br /><p>Steve Nash Youth Basketball League: <a href="http://www.snyb.ca/">http://www.snyb.ca/</a> RBL Youth Basketball: <a href="http://www.rblbasketball.ca/">http://www.rblbasketball.ca/</a></p><br /><p>Hockey:</p><br /><p>Vancouver Minor Hockey Association: <a href="http://www.vmha.com/leagues/homeVMHA.cfm?leagueID=0&clientID=3957&link=VMHA">http://www.vmha.com/leagues/homeVMHA.cfm?leagueID=0&clientID=3957&link=VMHA</a></p><br /><p>Swimming:</p><br /><p>Vancouver Parks and Rec Swimming Lessons: <a href="http://vancouver.ca/parks/rec/pools/lessons.htm">http://vancouver.ca/parks/rec/pools/lessons.htm</a></p><br /><p>Baseball:</p><br /><p>Baseball BC Youth Leagues: <a href="http://www.baseball.bc.ca/leagues.php">http://www.baseball.bc.ca/leagues.php</a></p><br /><p>Gymnastics</p><br /><p>Vancouver Phoenix Youth Gymnastics: <a href="http://www.vancouveryouth.ca/node/507">http://www.vancouveryouth.ca/node/507</a></p><br /><p>Volleyball</p><br /><p>Volleyball BC: <a href="http://www.volleyballbc.ca/">http://www.volleyballbc.ca/</a></p>J-Dubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14362869536861209711noreply@blogger.com0